Pilot Program Gives Boston Patron of Whiskey Priest Extra Hour of Losing Dignity Trying to Talk to Her

Pilot Program Gives Boston Patrons of Whiskey Priest an Extra Hour of Losing Dignity Trying to Talk to Her
Boston Mayor Marty Walsh has excited some business owners and nightlife enthusiasts with a pilot program to keep bars open past 3AM…but none more excited than the desperate asshole with the popped collar who just ordered another Jägerbomb at Whiskey Priest. The good news is that the program could bring the nightlife of Boston more in step with that of other world class American cities. The bad news is that he’s going to be intermittently staring you down for another sixty awkward and unstimulating minutes. The good news is that it means more sales and tips for restaurant and bar owners, helping the local economy. The bad news is that, given time for one more drink, he’ll actually have the balls to walk over and try to start a conversation with you…and then who knows how long it will take to shake him?? The good news is that, if successful, the pilot program could result in extended hours for other Boston neighborhoods. The bad news is that, in the meantime, you’ll have to count on the patrons of Whiskey Priest NOT to get shithouse drunk and drive into the ICA, start a fatal bro fight, or sexually assault someone, and instead set an overall good example. Oh shit, popped collar is walking over here.

GDG

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